Relationship Guide #3: The Growth Process

Dear Readers,

Jason and I finally made it through another year – Happy TWO years babe!!!

(This blog is being released a day earlier, our official anniversary date is June 25)

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2 YEARS LATER… 

THE BIGGEST RELATIONSHIP LESSON WE LEARNED THIS FAR, IS GROWTH.

Looking back at it, the two years we’ve had truly feels like two decades… I still can’t fully believe that Jason and I had only been together for this short, when his presence in my life is so great… I feel like I’ve known him all my life. The memories still feels brand new, our conversations never fails to bore me, our laughter still feels pure from within, and our relationship feels so much stronger than it had ever been.

But without a doubt, there were a few bumpy roads along the way… we had our fair share of fights like most couples do, and some fights were bigger than the rest. As each fight came and ended, we grew, we learned, and we became better. All our fights were never left unsettled. Regardless of how annoyed we were of each other, or how badly I wanted to walk away, we always found a way back to solve the issues we created in the first place. As my dad always told me, “never sleep angry because you do not want to wake up angry too.” 

Jason and I, we are nowhere close to perfect… but we work ourselves towards it… we slowly push each other to become the better version of ourselves day by day. We formed our relationship to break our own ideals of perfection, while slowly embracing the flaws that make us a unique pair. Of all the people I grew with, Jason is by far the best one as he walks and grows with me little by little, day by day.

Key note: we walk and grow together, never alone.

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At this time in my life, I’m in no rush to have it all figured out. To my younger readers, I have one simple message for you all:

 “Your early 20’s is a time to grow and learn. Make a few mistakes and learn from it. Fall hard on your feet, and grow right after. And at the end of it all, learn and grow some more.”

Please take that message personally into your current and future relationships too. Things aren’t always going to be pretty and all figured out. Sometimes, a couple have to face some harsh and ugly situations to get through the beautiful parts of their relationships. And for the most part, a relationship is a constant, day by day process of trying to figure life out together. Figuring life out together as a pair, is what it’s really all about.

During this process of “figuring life out”, you will grow.

A relationship should also give you plenty of room to grow, both as a pair and as a person. Never stop growing for the sake of yourself or for your partner. There will never come a time wherein your personal growth will stop… it can only be slowed down. Trust me, even old people still continue to grow day by day, because age is just a number while growth is a part of your life forever. And this same holds true for a couple’s growth. It never stops, it just slows down. The biggest setback within a relationship, is learning how to push through the slower stages of growth. But after maneuvering yourselves out of this slow and dreaded path, everything else will come so much easier. drawing-gif-cute-couple-2.gif

Growth. The constant purpose and desire to grow, is the true fuel that ignites a lasting and solid relationship. Don’t ever stop growing. 

As you all may already know, Jason doesn’t like to be publicized – he keeps a low profile. But, you all know ME and I BLOG. So, to end all of this up, I want to write a cute little message to the man who gave me the inspiration to blog, and the support I need to turn my life into the dream I’ve always envisioned.

Dear Jason,

Thank you for being you. I love you so much and I can’t imagine how I would be like today without you impacting the decisions I make and being a part of all my growth. Thank you for keeping me grounded, for telling me I’m wrong when I insist on being right, and for always believing in me. Thank you for taking my Instagram photos and being my date on countless social media events. Thank you, for literally everything you do to make my life a whole lot easier. Happy two years my love, to forever to go.

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With love,

Mary Dezleigh Teodosio.

TWENTY-THREE

Dear Readers,

YOUR GIRL IS NOW 23!!!

My 22nd year of living literally felt like a storm. It all happened too quick, and so much has happened. From starting my 22nd year with my friends partying, to falling in love with Jason, to completing my final year of university, expanding my blog, discovering my future, and to travelling Kelowna… all of it happened within 365 days.

TODAY, I still stand the same influential, positive, charismatic, sweet and loving Dezleigh. The recent year taught me how to be braver, and matured me in ways I could never imagine. I learned that sometimes life will get so dark that keeping a positive outlook gets a little tough… yet, I learned that if you surround yourself with people who carry stars on their eyes, and the sun in their hearts… I learned that these people’s light and glow, will lead you out of your darkness.

At 22, I learned how to value my friends, family, and Jason even MORE.

To my friends, I owe them so much for being the support system I needed when I was emotionally drowning. They were my life vessel, that carried me through the days wherein I felt like giving up. Graduating university would never be the same if I didn’t have my friends by my side. My success is partially theirs. I am so blessed to have them in my life.

To my family, I’m so thankful to have such a loving and supportive family like the one I have. My aunts are my first best friends, who only want the best for me. My uncles are my first protectors, who are there to watch over my back. My dad is my idol, who showed me how to live life to the fullest no matter what. Steve is my superhero, who raised me into becoming a strong woman full of wisdom, courage, and bravery. My mom, is a goddess with the power to heal my broken wounds and empower my frightened soul to believe that nothing is impossible if I hustle, pray, and dream. My whole life would be meaningless without my family.

To Jason, throughout this whole year, you were by my side through each chapter – may it be good or bad. I am truly in awe and madly in love with you. You calm my storms, and make my sunny days last longer than normal. Through you, I had gained another family outside my family. Another branch in my family tree has been born because of you. Jonas, is like the brother I never had and your mom is like my second mom who graces me with gentleness and calmness. Above all, you had taught me so many things and I am just so thankful to have you around as I continue on with life.

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Now that I’m getting older, each birthday feels a little sadder than the year before. Perhaps, it comes with the sad realization that I’m aging and losing my youthful years. But when I remind myself of all the great memories I made, the accomplishments I earned, the people who love me, and the great life I live – all of these combined makes me so happy and makes me feel so blessed.

This year, I will be travelling to Vegas to celebrate my 23rd birthday. Our Vegas trip is only the first of all the great things to come this year!!!

To my Readers, thank you for keeping up with me throughout the years. Without your support in reading, liking my Instagram photos, and supporting all my content, I wouldn’t be the influential Dezleighh that I am today. Thank you for embarking my life’s journey with me.

I pray that all my plans, goals, and dreams will come true in my 23rd year of life.

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With love,

Mary Dezleigh Teodosio.

Relationship Mood Board – How to Celebrate Your One Year Anniversary!!

Dear Readers,

As you all may already know, Jason and I celebrated our one year anniversary on June 25, 2018. Since it was on a Monday, we decided to have our anniversary dinner on Saturday, June 23. Here are some pics from our dinner at Sukiyaki House:

On our actual anniversary date on June 25, 2018, Jason and I made a Mood Board!!!!

What is a Mood Board?

Ideally, a Mood Board is a giant poster/board that hold photos, and words that lead towards inspiration. Ultimately, a Mood Board should help you visualize what you’re thinking or dreaming about in your head. By putting all of these creative ideas or dreams or visions you have from your head, into something physical such as a poster paper, can help you channel out your energy the right way. It helps you determine the goals you have in mind, and pushes you to believe and strive towards those goals.

The power of the mind is no joke. Have you ever heard of the saying, “the more you think, dream, and pray about it, the more it’ll come true”. The Mood Board, is the visual representation of that saying.

The idea of making a Mood Board came from my best friend, Tamika. Originally, she told me to make one for myself only… but then I realized, why not make a “Relationship Mood Board” instead?!?!

Jason and I gathered photos from the internet that represented the 5 most important things in our relationship. These 5 are:

1.) Family

2.) Home

3.) Pet

4.) Travel

5.) Cars

This is how our Mood Board looks like:

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As you can see, at the back of our board we wrote a special letter from our “current selves” to our “future selves”.  It’s a reminder of who we are right now, and who we aspire to be… just in case, somewhere along our lives wherein we might forget.

A quick summary of the 5 most important things in our life, and the photos we selected.

  1. Family – Jason and I want to have 2 kids. We also want to establish our careers as CPAs (Chartered Professional Accountants) and land stable jobs. We both agree that job security is important in order to maintain a happy family.
  2. Home – Thankfully, we both agree to a modern looking house, and modern decor. I want a nice kitchen, with white marble countertops, white walls, and modern furnitures. Jason wants a gaming room, wherein he can play his gaming computer, TV, Xbox, and Play Station (typical guy, I know).
  3. Pet – This was mostly MY IDEA. I grew up with two cats, and ever since I lost them, I’ve been relentlessly dreaming of owning my own pet cat. Ideally, I want a fat grey cat, just like the one on our Mood Board 🙂
  4. Travel – Both of us want to travel the world before we officially settle, get married and have kids. At the top of our travel bucket list includes, Philippines (my country of birth), China (Jason’s country of birth), Mexico, and Las Vegas (Jason enjoys gambling – so this would be the perfect getaway for him!).
  5. Cars – Our dream cars all happen to be in white colors!!! Mine would be the G-Wagon, and his are the other two cars on the board (I have no idea what they’re called).

I love our Mood Board!!!

It’s the best source of inspiration, and motivation to keep on going. It’s truly a physical way of viewing our dreams as a couple. Now that I have it up in my room, every time I glance at it, I feel so much more inspired… more motivated… more ambitious… and it feels as if my dreams, are not too far away.

Our Relationship Mood Board, represents the goals that Jason and I are working towards. Each couple must have these sets of goals, because having an end goal wherein both partners can work towards is key to a lasting relationship. How dull would your relationship be, if you and your partner have no dreams… no shared visions… no shared goals… A couple must always, always dream and work hard together, because that is truly the key to a beautiful and long relationship.

Remember this, “the glory and joy of achieving your goals as a couple will taste so much sweeter, because the couple dreamed it together, worked for it together, and are living in it together. Don’t let your fear hold you back… support each other… encourage the other… and one day, in God’s good grace, you’ll have everything in your Relationship Mood Board too!” 

With love,

Mary Dezleigh Teodosio.